Would You Kill A Man For An iPod Ninja? Would You Kill A Man WITH One?

Ty Dunitz September 25 Apple

Turns out Big Steve isn’t the ninja we all thought he was. After being pulled aside and searched at Kansai International Airport in Japan, throwing stars were allegedly

“iPod ninja fits into that sweet spot between the iPod touch and a small handgun,” Apple spokesperson Ted Wetmore tells Scoopertino. “It gives you peace of mind. You can either enjoy your music on the device — or you can fling it at anyone who looks at you funny.”

I obvs called up Apple to preorder like ten of these – who wouldn’t – but the associate I spoke to cleverly feigned ignorance. Whatever, phone lady. The cat’s out of the bag.

I sure hope these come with free bumpers.

Written by Ty Dunitz

Ty is an illustrator who stays up too late, and has to wear glasses. You can follow him on Twitter if you want to (@glitchritual), but he's just gonna throw your stupid PR crap in the garbage, so don't email him.

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  • …you’ve got to admit… with all the myriad rumors that can be started about a celebrity, being rumored to be a NINJA is pretty awesome. If I were Steve Jobs, (after the rumored ninja star dealio) I’d think this was pretty funny…

  • anon

    wtf are talking are doing a lame commercial.

  • Syed Rakib Al Hasan

    is this a cover up initiative after the japan airport story by any chance?
    that’s smoothhh!!!!

  • Jo Danne

    NO way dude! Too cool. Must have


  • very good indeed show the ball of parabens ta