Yo, dawg. I heard you like Twitter, so I installed a keyboard in your shoe, so you can tweet while you walk. Seriously, not much is known about this shoe, beyond that it exists. An exercise in geek chic (oh man, exercise… pun totally not intended, but welcome), the keyboard is almost certainly non-functional, and just a hip sole design. And yes, it would probably be unwise to stick a keyboard on the underside of one’s footwear anyway. But imagine if you could get good at it, or something? Like, sure, you’d be walking like a tap-dancing zombie, but if you live in a highly populated urban center, you won’t…

What are you downloading right now? Don’t give me that face. Few people don’t hit the torrents. I’ve got season 2 of TNG queued up as we speak – and I have TorrentReactor to thank. And I’m not the only one who has to thank TorrentReactor, either. Perhaps you’ve heard of the Russian village of Gar. Perhaps you’ve been struck twice by lightning. With a population of 214, three computers and one dialup connection, Gar isn’t exactly a bustling center of commerce. But it could one day be one of piracy, for sure; TorrentReactor has bought the entire village for $150,000. No joke – TorrentReactor has indeed…

Straight outta the wish-I’d-thought-of-that department comes François Vautier, a video artist unafraid to sully precious technology with soil and insects. After filling his scanner with ants, Vautier proceeded to scan the colony each week for five years. The result is a fascinating time-lapsed trip through an almost-surreal biotechnical landscape. Personally, I don’t understand how he shot the video from BELOW the scanner, but life’s full of questions….

Alright, this just blew my mind a little. Not so much that I’m left a catatonic husk, though – I can still type. Lucky you. Anyway, Sony has filed two patents (bada boom, bada bing) that, when combined, reveal the secret to local multiplayer gaming like ain’t never been seen before. Actually, it will technically never be seen, even once it’s implemented. We’re all familiar with how 3D works, right? Alternating frames, left and right, illusion of depth, all that jazz. I won’t insult your intelligence. Sony has filed patents that dare threaten to take the concept to the next level – offering the end…

It’s no secret that Apple is big in Japan. That everything is big in Japan is besides the point – Apple is really big in Japan, guys. The release of an Apple product is nothing short of a holiday, and the Japanese seemingly make Apple’s offerings a more standard way of life than we do, even here. Case in point – You’re looking at shots of ease, a cafe in Tokyo’s Marunouichi Building, which offers its patrons an iPad at every table. ‘So what?’ you scoff. ‘Best Buy has a ton of public iPads.’ And true enough, I’d reply. But be that as it may, not only do you get to sip your pretentious beverage while fingering your…

If you’re not good and rested, take a nap before continuing with this article – because you’re never gonna sleep again. Bina and Martine Rothblatt are an extraordinarily wealthy couple concerned with human immortality. Martine is involved in the Terasem Movement, which explores immortality “via geoethical nanotechnology and personal cyberconsciousness.” In short, the Rothblatts are really keen on not dying. I don’t blame them – I too am pretty stoked about this whole ‘life’ thing I’ve got going on. In an attempt to immortalize herself for her partner, Bina has contracted Dave Hanson of Hanson…

These days, Big Steve (that’s Jobs, for anyone who hasn’t figured out my schtick yet) is considered by and large as magical as he likes to claim the iPad. What a handsome chin. What a dapper turtleneck. The guy’s gotta have a CHA score of, like, 18 at least. The turtleneck’s probably giving him a bonus, too. Hunkalicious. Over the last couple months, one easy out for blogfolk tapped for stories has been to report on random emails, from both consumers and fans alike, that Jobs has decided to cryptically answer. Much to his chagrin, though, said laziness on the part of the blogfolk has created an unrelenting…

Watch this. Study it. Chew on it for awhile. I’ll let the original source say his piece. I was emailed this video by my brother who lives in Canada. He told me that is shows (so he was told) a joint US/Russian expedition to mars in the late 1970′s. When I asked him where he got this video, I expected him to say some “friend of a friend of a friend nonsence”, etc. But he said a colleague of his downloaded it off some russian video site only 2 days ago. I have taken the liberty of creating a Youtube account and uploading this video so that I can get some input on this, as if this is proven to be real, there is going to be…

So I heard there was, like, some kinda phone or something being released today. Bunch of people are in line, I heard. I won’t pretend not to be excited about the iPhone 4, even though my current phone contract and general lack of income will disallow my having one for the next several eons. Though if initial reports are any indication, maybe I don’t want one for awhile. While most first shipments are not without their flaws, the iPhone 4 seems to be sporting some pretty ugly ones, and not even counting the apparently easily-cracked screen (what the tits do you think will happen if you go around intentionally…

California must really be strapped for cash. In a move to generate some revenue, the state is considering a bill to allow electronic advertisements to be placed on vehicle license plates. Before your ass gets too puckered, I hear you – what about driver safety, right? Apparently, the ads will only play if a vehicle idles for more than four seconds, or is stopped entirely. The plate number would be visible perpetually in one form or another. That’s… slightly better, I guess. “The idea is not to turn a motorist’s vehicle into a mobile billboard,” said Senator Curren Price, the guy behind the idea,…