Eric Schmidt: The Last Man On Earth Denying Google Me

Eric Schmidt (guy who runs Google, if you’re new to this ‘inter-net’ thing) was quoted this week as saying that Google was, in fact, not developing a service to rival Facebook. “The world doesn’t need a copy of the same thing,” he said.

Oh really, Eric? Because be your inescapable charisma and otherworldly good looks as they may, that’s not what I heard. I heard you’re doing exactly the opposite of not creating a Facebook-like service. I heard it’s called Google Me. I heard it’s coming soon. So while you’re for sure the slickest, most hunkalicious snake charmer I’ve ever seen, I gotta go with everybody else on this.

Maybe Schmidt’s just a little jaded. After all, Google has pretty well struck out three times now in the social arena (Orkut, Wave, Buzz), – it’s entirely possible he’s just shielding his ass in the event Google is developing another bomb. But Google is definitely in talks with Playdom, EA, and Zynga (the latter of which Google has even funded), so it would seem that for its next trick, Google’s definitely got something Facebook in scale up its sleeve. And it makes sense: more and more advertising revenue is being eaten by social networking, Google would be positively daffy not to try again.

Fourth time’s a charm, right Eric?

Written by Ty Dunitz

Ty is an illustrator who stays up too late, and has to wear glasses. You can follow him on Twitter if you want to (@glitchritual), but he's just gonna throw your stupid PR crap in the garbage, so don't email him.

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  • Here is my theory for the “failures” of google products you speak of.

    Google has never done something without reason

    Google Orkut – the Google Me Beta
    Google Buzz – the newsfeed of the future Google Me
    Google Wave + Google Calendar – The Events Management section (would offer a far more comprehensive event planning area that what is currently on Facebook)
    Google Mail – The messages section
    Google Checkout – Their version of the Marketplace
    Google (the search engine) – How awesome would searching your entire mailbox, friends list, status updates, etc be from one search box
    Google Talk – Facebook Chat blows, Google Talk doesnt
    And so on with almost every Google product.

    I think that if you look at every feature of Facebook, Google already has a more comprehensive product out there. What do you get when you combine all the Google Products, besides that stupid layout on the profile page, you get what could potentially be the end all be all of Social Networks.

    • Wow. Bravo, Eric. Very, very good call.

  • George T

    If anyone can take on Facebook it is Google. Now is great time for someone to get in that space will all the negative press for Facebook. One thing Google needs to do is hire some designers.

    Eric, very interesting take. Thanks for commenting.